sure I think that past by some.. but my point is that is the way soft groups are designed to work - if they were the same as ordinary groups there would be little point in having them - they are 'linked' objects, select one you select them all

edit: for example say you have a mass of objects and you only want to select three, but because of the positioning marque selection would select dozens - if the three are soft grouped you only need find and click the one, and they do not need to be on the same layer stacked together as in a normal group would have to be